And TOTALLY underpaid. I've come to the conclusion that I'm not only overworked and grossly underpaid for what I do, but I'm under appreciated too. That's a horrible feeling. Especially when what I do is what I love. For those that don't know, I'm a photographer...on my own and for Sears Portrait studio as well. There are good and bad to each of them. I love Sears, cause I have studio lighting, all kinds of cool props and backgrounds, and a super easy editing program at my finger tips. But I barely get paid minimum wage, and am constantly taking insane amounts of verbal abuse from people. I don't get it. People see how hard I work at capturing their memories, their child's smiles and laughter, and cuteness, and yet...I'm the target of all of their rage. I got scream {no, seriously, SCREAMED} at yesterday by a woman who was 3 HOURS late for her appointment. She was late for her appointment the day before too! Earlier in the day I was yelled at because someone didn't read their discount card.
Not only that...I did something to my back/neck on Thursday...and I've been trying since then to get someone to cover me for a couple hours so I could go get checked out. I don't like to take chances with my fibro, and such. No one would cover, not my manager, not my other co worker, not anyone from the other 5 studio's in our district. REALLY????
Ok, fine, whatever, I was figuring I'd go today, as I have the day off...granted I'd have to go alone, as it's MyFireBoy's day on. I hate going to the hospital, or urgent care by myself...HATE.
Then I get a call from my mom at 830 this morning, telling me she's calling the rescue and going to the ER. She's 4.5 hours away, and I'm helpless to do anything! I hate that feeling. Then to top thing off...my manager calls me and tells me I HAVE to come in this afternoon. Um...hold up for a hot second. I've been trying to get someone to cover me for a few hours and you've refused, and now you want favors?? Not so much! I relent, and tell her I'll be there. take a quick look at the clock, see that I have just enough time to go to urgent care and still make it to work. Throw on some clothes, and my favorite pink Yankee's hate {not so loved in this neck of the woods} and off I go.
Get there, get checked in, put a happy little johnny on {why are they called johnny's anyway??}. Have x-ray's, finally get seen, only to find out that I'm one gigantic muscle sprain/spasm/stiffness. Which probably could have all been avoided had I not worked 8 hours on Thursday, and 10 hours yesterday, moving props, bending, twisting, up and down, and the like. GREAT. Just what I need right now.
So, the moral of my rambling is...I'm out of work until after we get back from our mock anniversary trip next week, and I have a new found grudge against those that I work for/with. I'm torn...I love what I do, photography, and cooking are my passions...but I think I'm going to have to hit the job hunt HARD, and maybe go back into a restaurant, and just work on getting my photography off the ground. I can't keep driving an hour each way, to get paid peanuts, and verbally abused...it's just not helping. All it's doing is putting my on edge, which in turn is making my take things out on TheFireBoy. Not good...so for the sanity of myself, and the health of my {almost} one year marriage, somethings gotta give.
Oh, and, my mom is home and doing better now, after spending nearly 12 hours in the ER. I, on the other hand...I don't know how I am...I'm frustrated, depressed, scared, and angry. And now I'm just rambling...so...that about does it for me tonight.
Thanks to anyone who made it this far.
