Ok, so I know it's been awhile since I posted. I don't have an excuse really. We went to my moms last weekend for our anniversary {can you believe we've been married a WHOLE YEAR???}.
And since we've been home, I've been sick {again} and...I lost my job. At first I was wicked pissed about it. Now I'm ok with it. It wasn't the right place for me anyway. And I wasn't really making any money when you figure in how much gas I was using, and money for food and such, so, yeah I'm better off anyway.
In other news, my depression and anxiety have come back with a VENGEANCE. I feel like doing nothing. Literally, I have to drag myself out of bed {on the days that i do} to get anything done. That being said, I've finally found a new PCP and am hoping that this will help. We think we've figured out why I've been throwing up so often, and so far so good. I'm also being referred back to therapy {YAY} so hopefully that will help...I may end up on meds, and I'm ok with that...I think that I've come to the conclusion that I may not be able to handle my mental health on my own. While it's a hard pill to swallow {no pun intended} it's what's best for me and Nick and our future family.
So now here I am, on the job hunt like whoa, and I've already had a bite, so that makes me happy. I'm trying to go home to stay with my mom for a week or two before I start a new job, to distress, and get away from the craziness here. Part of me feels like I'm abandoning my husband and marriage, but I know that I have to do it, or I'm just going to hurt both. I'm not coping well here, and I have to find a way to fix that, until we can get a place of our own.
I guess that's it from here for now, other then to tell everyone that I have the most patient, understanding and loving husband a women could ever ask for. I don't know what I would do with out TheFireBoy. He has been so amazing to me, not only through our entire relationship, but especially lately as I loose my temper, ability to cope, I've been crying all the time, and just not the me he fell in love with. So, yeah....I love you more then words can say FireBoy!!
I'll be back with an update soon, and keep an eye on Color Me Silly, I plan to have alot more pictures up there too!
Much Love!